Fox is reporting this (Pilot union suggests phasing out masculine terms, says ‘cockpit,’ ‘father’ is offensive to DEI culture). I’m cribbing their language because of the amble opportunities for sarcastic remarks (think of your own and contribute). I am really finding this hard to believe. It reads like satire.
The world’s largest airline pilot union, Air Line Pilots Association (ALPA), which represents over 70,000 pilots worldwide, and brags about its collaboration with United Nations agency on its DEI policies (now there’s some good news), has suggested airmen and airwomen stop using terms purportedly offensive to women and LGBTQ individuals. Because ALPA knows what offends women and LGBTQ individuals.
An example of a noninclusive term is “cockpit.” Now I will never be able to say that word without thinking about a place to put my junk.
According to the 2021 DEI language guide (Newspeak), ALPA lists terms and phrases to avoid for the sake of inclusion. Avoid “masculine generalizations.” I can’t generalize about men? No. In fact, stop using “man” and “men” altogether. Don’t say “manpower,” say “people/human power.” “People power.” Isn’t that a political slogan? (feeling the urge to make a fist)
The guide usefully provides an example: “Who will provide the people/human power to support this event?” How about “Who will provide the manpower to support this event?” Fewer letters. Meaning crystal.
Also, don’t say “guys,” when addressing groups. (Heaven help you if you say “gals.”) But if the gender binary is a myth, then what is “guys” not inclusive of? Never mind, “guys” is also not inclusive of “transgender people and people with different gender identities.”
You knew this was coming (too). ALPA advises against using “mother/father.” Not because the construction sounds hermaphroditic, but because this could alienate “different family structures, such as grandparents as caregivers, same-sex parents.” Holy fucking Christ.
And this: avoid “husband/wife” and “boyfriend/girlfriend” because those phrases ignore same-sex couples. Even if I’m not not talking about same-sex couples? Even if I’m not talking about husbands and their wives?
“Inclusive language in communications is essential to our union’s solidarity and collective strength and is an important factor in maintaining flight safety,” the guide states. “The purpose of this language guide is to offer examples of terms and phrases that promote inclusion and equity.” Gag me with a spoon.
ALPA suggests replacing “cockpit” with “flight deck.” Is that better? I hear some racy implications in “all hands on deck.” Here’s a way better word: “bridge.” Here’s an example: “I’ll meet you on the bridge.”
But why not “cockpit”? ALSP says that word “has been and may be used in a derogatory way to exclude women in the piloting profession.” According to the guide, women have heard that “it’s called a cockpit for a reason.” That’s what they said a male pilot told them. How many male pilots to them that? How many times? Or did we all hear that on the playground?
For the record, the word “cockpit” has nothing to do with the male appendage.
freedom and reason 